12
May
13

The Unnamable II: The Statement of Randolph Carter (1992)

Randolph Carter. Seriously, this is a college kid?

Randolph Carter. Seriously, this is a college kid?

There’s something fun about watching horror sequels without seeing the original. There’s less investment; zero expectation. I’m not sure that over-investment is a danger with The Unnamable series, though. This movie is… kind of… ridiculous.

Based on a short story by H. P. Lovecraft, The Unnamable II: The Statement of Randolph Carter centers around a scary old house with an even older demon inside. The film opens with a bunch of Carter’s friends getting hacked to pieces by the thing. Well, like any normal, curious college kid, Carter decides the only thing to

John Rhys-Davies as the professor of folklore!

John Rhys-Davies as the professor of folklore!

do is go back to the old house, with his university’s folklore professor (who is also proficient in chemistry, biology and mathematics, of course) to prove that the old legends about this particular demon are true.

The problem is, this isn’t just a demon. It’s a demon who’s taken over a young woman’s body. How to separate the two? Well, insulin, of course – thankfully, our good professor brought some along so he can separate woman from beast! The result: a naked lady with long hair clings to “Car… ter?” for the remainder of the film, while the demon is set loose to wreak havoc all over the small town of Arkham, MA.

DEMON!

DEMON!

Oh man, there is so much wrong with this movie. First of all, the actor that plays Carter, Mark Kinsey Stephenson, looks like he’s about forty-years-old. I’m supposed to buy that he’s a college kid? Worse still, I’m supposed to believe that cute naked chick is going to fall in love with him within five minutes of meeting him? Beyond that, everyone’s acting is really, really shitty. Aside from a cameo by David Warner and a small part played by John Rhys-Davies (also known as “that guy from Raiders of the Lost Ark), no one you’ve ever heard of is in this. Which is fine. But they’re all terrible! Then there are the plot holes. Again, I’ve never read the original story, but really I’m supposed to believe the

Oh, Alyda. So innocent, so naked, so bereft of demon.

Oh, Alyda. So innocent, so naked, so bereft of demon.

folklore professor just carries insulin around with him? And that insulin will release a demon spirit from a human’s body? Sheesh!

All that being said, I really did enjoy this movie; its goofiness is its savior. My jaw kept dropping with each ridiculous turn. While I’m not exactly sure I could say I recommend this, I could definitely see myself popping it in amongst friends for some late-night viewing pleasure. It’s a three-star movie, but in a different way than Snow White: A Tale of Terror is. Let’s put it this way: I forgot I even watched that Snow White movie, but The Unnamable II was definitely memorable!

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